Shove It Up Your...
...chicken's ass. I find it greatly improved after a meaningful probe, like so many others I could name.
I didn't make this method up. I wish I had though. It's a chicken squatting on a thingy that you put in a roaster or whatever pan, and then cook it. I think some people use beer cans. Empty? No idea. Rather than google it and use a cheap can I searched high and low for this high end (or would that be low end?) gadget.
It's what I do.
Such was my zeal to cram this up the backside of my bird that I forgot to take a photo. But here it is:
Grab his oily, orangey, salted and peppered little self and stuff him on the Eiffel Tower. That obscene, phallic thing sticking out the top is the neck...so they say.
I didn't like the looks of it so I did some quick accessorizing.
I'm sure there are other brands, but this is a Spanek. Note it's resemblance to the Eiffel tower. If you have to have something stuffed up your arse...might as well look like a French landmark.
Preheat your oven to 450.
First, you need to make sure the wily thing doesn't take off. Once they get a gander (that's almost a pun) at that Spanek, they're not that into it. You can see this guy was trying to make a run for it...
Remove all the gross innards that come inside your chicken. Does anyone under the age of 80 use any of that crap? I refuse to cook anything that looks like a blister.
Anyway, make sure the bird is empty. Rinse it out and off, then pat it dry with paper towels. I squeeze the juice of an orange over it and in it, then smear olive oil all over it (all sides) then shake a good dose of salt and garlic pepper everywhere.
You can spray or oil the Spanek too, if the spirit moves you. It didn't me.
I put some herbs I had on hand to good use.
The Spanek takes up most of the room inside the poor chicken so you've got to get creative with the bling. One must suffer for beauty though, and I think he looks quite a bit better with a bit of festive greenery around his collar.
I'm sure you agree.
Put the whole undignified mess into a pan that has at least 2 inch edges and has enough room to pour about an inch of liquid. I used an 8 inch. cast iron skillet and some chicken broth. They say (no idea who they is but they're full of advice) to keep adding liquid so your oven doesn't smoke up. I didn't, and the oven didn't.
It was just right. Not much liquid left and all the rich, crusty bits intact on the skillet's surface.
And here he is. Handsome devil, no?
Roast at 450 for 15 minutes then turn the oven down to 350 and continue to roast for a total of 15 minutes per pound, including the initial time at 450. So, if you have a 4 pound chicken it will cook for a total of one hour. But, use your judgement. I think I cooked mine about 20 minutes a pound. If it doesn't look done, it isn't.
Here's how I like mine. Crispy.
See those glorious drippings gathered in the skillet? That's what I'm talkin' about. Don't get rid of those! You gotta make gravy.
Pull out the withered greens and the Spanek. You can lay it on a cutting board first, and then pull it out. Using your hands (but the chicken's hot) or forks. The method I use, that never fails, is I have my hubby do it. But have at it, if you're inclined.
He took one for the team, for the benefit of all.
2/3/2014 12:38:12 am
I always wondered how these things worked, seems pretty simple. Like the accessories you placed on top :) Will have to try, but I might go the easy route and try it with a beer can (bottle?).
2/3/2014 04:22:41 am
Yeah, I think with the beer can, you pop the top and pour out some, but not all, of the beer. I think the beer does something magical to the chicken. Don't hold me to this...definitely look for a real recipe from someone who knows what they're talking about. I don't know about a bottle...or how much heat it can take without exploding. This standing method does make a nice crisp chicken!
2/3/2014 04:23:49 am
I know! Crazy, right? The one thing I miss is you can't stuff it. I like a nice stuffed chicken. But, to change it up it's fun to do. Thanks so much for reading and commenting!
1/14/2015 12:08:25 pm
I am totally going to have to try that. I like that it's crispy all around. Great pictures Kathleen.
1/29/2015 09:08:02 am
I will happily confirm some of us do use beer cans. Raid your spice rack of favorites, make up a rub (anything will do, it is hard to really mess this up. Be brave!) and generously apply to rinsed and patted dry chicken. Open beer can and punch some extra holes around the top. Pour out just the top 1/8 to 1/4 contents. Put extra rub in the beer. I place on a BBQ grill (cover closed) for 1 to 1-1/2 hrs, medium heat. If you want to capture drippings you'll need to provide a foil pan to catch. Use different beers and every chicken will have slightly different flavor.
2/8/2015 02:15:59 am
I should've known you'd know all about this! I've gotta try it.
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My upcoming novel Flesh of My Flesh stars Delilah, a fictional TV Chef who stirs up a whole lot of trouble and a little food. Probably better than you'll find here. These recipes are inspired by her, my love of food and overall laziness.
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